Today is my First Surgery...

So... Today is the day! My mom is driving me to the hospital as I am writing this. I have butterflies in my stomach, not nervous really for surgery, more excited to get this underway... Still nervous about waking up after with a chest I won't recognize.

I find it incredible how much can happen in just 24 hours. I have moved out of my own cute Wolseley apartment and back home with my parents, i did my last shift as a Coordinator at my old job, did a shift at my new job and will be changing my bra size on the right side in just a couple of hours.

As I sit beside my mom in this car she does her nervous chatter, speaking quickly and constantly about everything other than surgery... I want to mention how much I appreciate silence, instead I just keep quiet and nod and agree with everything. I know as we get closer to the hospital she will start asking the infamous 'how are you feeling?' It seems that everyone asks this question in a strange, almost secretive, tone. I want to say 'I feel fine! Nothing has happened to me yet... Come back for the truth around 2 this afternoon when I'm awake afterward!' However I don't think today is the day to start pissing people off so I just say 'fine.'

I have an urge to yell and scream and cry... To be mean to everyone for no good reason. I will hold back though because I am positive this is stemming from not being allowed to have coffee this morning.

I will keep my mouth closed, heart open, and try to just appreciate that the surgery will be starting in a couple of hours and my friends and family are the way they are because they care. I Love Them!

Signing off now... Wish me luck!